The year I turned 40 I had quite a few "firsts" in life. And since I knew that year/decade would start off with change, I chopped my hair short (well, short for me).
I found this page I made that year. It was above my shoulders... at least 5 inches were cut.
Change in hair, always indicates change in your life.
I had also just started this blog a few months earlier. So... if you do the math, that was 7 years ago.
That year was the first time I shot a gun... a completely empowering experience.
It was the first time I went horse-back riding... ridin' my pony.
It was the first time I had any of my scrapbooking work published in a magazine... very exciting!
Many memorable things happened that year. There was a huge surprise party thrown for me (2 parties actually & I was completely shocked by both), I ran my 2nd half marathon with a PR (2:00:31... those damn 31 seconds still piss me off too because under 2 hrs was my goal. LOL), my amazing craft room was completed, several vacations & much more... 40 was definitely FABULOUS.
To be honest, in my 40's I've physically been in the best shape of my life too.
The hell with your 20's. Life begins after that for sure.
That summer I attended a Women of Faith conference with friends. The biggest thing I took away from that experience & I even wrote it down while I was sitting there, was "NO is a complete sentence."
NO.
Period.
It doesn't require further explanation.
It shouldn't have guilt or apologies attached to saying it.
You shouldn't have to come up with an excuse for making it sound better.
Just NO.
I think it takes getting to your 40's before you have enough life experience & confidence to stop worrying about what others think.
What others think of you. What others think of what you have to say. What others think if you simply say NO.
And I still say no with apologies & a comma... rather than a period.
It's not always an easy word to say, but when I say it I do mean it. Even if you keep asking until you get the yes answer you want from me, it's still NO.
At 47 I can say that in this past year I've been open to saying YES to stepping outside my comfort zone. To taking chances & saying YES to opportunities when they're only knocking lightly. To saying YES, when I'm nervous about the outcome. And it has opened up so many good things for me... a new chapter in life.
However, I got to this point by also saying NO.
No to what was no longer working. To finally learning to say NO... rather than saying yes & being resentful.
Does any of this make sense?
How about you. Can you say NO without apologies or excuses?
When is the last time you said yes because you felt guilty saying no?
When is the last time you reluctantly said yes, because it was easier than saying no?
On the flip side... when is the last time you stepped outside your comfort zone & said yes to something that scared you?
When is the last time you said yes to making a big change in your life... your health, your hair, your job?
What have you got to lose by saying it?
Change is never the result of being comfortable. Change only happens when we're willing to be uncomfortable... in our workouts... in our life.
Simple words like YES & NO are sometimes harder for women especially to say.
But go ahead & say them anyway.
Quit trying to make everyone happy. Start owning who you are & how you feel... & ROCK IT.
No excuses.
For whatever reason, this song came to mind today. A good friend told me about it last year & before I even finished listening to the whole song, I texted her back saying OMG I LOVE IT.
Too bad I could never use it for Zumba. Pretty sure I'd get fired from the Y. LOL
The video is pretty obnoxious & the lyrics aren't for little ears or for listening to at work, but I love it...
And speaking of Zumba... more dancing happens tonight! YES!!!
Yes. Yes. And yes to this post. Thank you for your inspiration always. I've always had a hard time saying no , and this is exactly what I needed to read today.
Posted by: Sarah | October 28, 2015 at 04:20 PM
OMG! I love that song!!!!!! And no, I still can't say no ... ugh ... someday I will learn :(
Posted by: Julie Tucker-Wolek | October 28, 2015 at 08:50 PM