Thank you for all your amusing comments yesterday. I particularly liked the comment that a huge zit is way worse than a bad hair day. I have to agree. You can wear a hat on a bad hair day. But what do you do with a huge zit? Wear a hockey mask? Anyway, it's always good to be reminded that all parents go through the same mind-boggling issues that I occasionally do. Suffice it to say though, my morning was put into perspective last night at bedtime.
I was laying in Bryn's bed talking to her before I said goodnight, as we do most nights, when she said, "Mrs. ****** said she had some sad news to deliver today."
I said, "What was it?"
She said, "She told us that Frank's mom died."
I covered my mouth & tears started streaming out of my eyes. I said, "What happened? Was she sick?"
She said, "I don't know. She didn't tell us. She told us we could make cards for him though if we wanted."
We talked a little longer while I tried to keep it together. And then I burst into tears when I left her room. I've only been around Frank a few times this year so far, as I only get to be at school for parties & random other reasons. The older she gets, the less they need parent volunteers unfortunately. Frank was new to our school this year though & I remember his mom introducing him to Bryn's teacher on Meet The Teacher Night. I overheard her saying that Frank wears hearing aids. I had a soft spot in my heart for him, being the new kid, and suggested we should buy him a package of Cardinals Baseball Silly Bandz about a month into the school year when she mentioned how much he LOVED baseball & really liked her Silly Bandz that were sports-related shapes. She said he went crazy over them when she gave him the package that day.
I don't know Frank's family at all. But what's so upsetting to me is the unfairness of such a young child losing their mom. My niece lost her mom, my sister, when she was only 8 months old. It's hard enough to lose a parent as an adult. Bob's still working through it. I can't imagine the impact it has on someone so young.
In just a couple weeks it will have been 9 years since my sister passed away... Easter Day that year to be exact. Frank's loss just stirred up emotions for me in remembering my niece's loss. Sydney didn't have a long enough time to get to know her mom, but Frank certainly did.
Kinda put the whole bad hair day into perspective for me.
On a lighter note... Bryn got into the car when I picked her up from school yesterday & told me, "Everyone said I totally overdressed for pictures today."
I said, "You just wore a simple casual cotton dress...it's not like you wore anything fancy? Don't ever listen to what anyone else thinks about your hair, your clothes, your shoes or whatever. If you like it, that's all that matters."
She said, "Well, I didn't end up wearing my sandals for the picture. I just wore my tennis shoes."
I said, "Yeah, well I've been telling you that wearing white open-toed sandals in March when it's 40 degrees isn't very fashionable anyway."
I can't say wearing tennis shoes with a dress is very fashionable either, but at least that choice was appropriate for the weather. LOL!
I love seeing the picture of your beautiful sister and her baby. I am sure her daughter will cherish pictures like this. There are so many aspects of loss that make it so hard to understand. I can certainly relate to that rush of emotion that can be brought out by a seemingly unrelated conversation. I am sorry that this was so difficult for you...
Michelle P.
Posted by: Michelle Perris | March 08, 2011 at 11:27 PM
I'm so sad for Frank. Losing a parent at that age . . . knowing them, loving them . . . more than just other's memories of her. So, so heartbreaking. That makes me very sad.
Posted by: MelanieJ | March 09, 2011 at 12:19 AM
just sending some hugs today from 1,050 miles away... :hug: :hug: :hug:
Posted by: asarasota | March 09, 2011 at 06:39 AM
Awwwwwww *sigh* this makes my heart sad... I will add Frank to my prayers.. sooooo sad... and i love that photo of your sis and sydney.... gosh woman... why you gotta make me cry today??? lol... I can't have ANYTHING to drink right now... welllllll for the next like 9 hours...and I gonna get all dried up now!! LOL!! love you...and give bryn a hug for us! :):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):)
Posted by: Julie Tucker-Wolek | March 09, 2011 at 07:43 AM
What a moving post - how trivial most of our daily "issues" are and yet some of these very "issues" will remain with us as wonderful memories. So sad that your niece has no memories of her mother, but I know that she is blessed to be a part of your family.
Posted by: Chris Aiton | March 09, 2011 at 08:17 AM
Wow. Such sad news. Good perspective, for sure. TFS, Deana!
Posted by: Amy H | March 09, 2011 at 08:38 AM
That's so so so tough. Such sad news...
Posted by: Jing-Jing Nickel | March 09, 2011 at 08:46 AM
It is so difficult to cometo terms with the loss of someone we love. I will be praying for Frank and his family. It is so sad for your niece not to have known her mother but you and your family will be able to tell her so much about her.
Posted by: Lilith | March 09, 2011 at 08:50 AM
oh goodness that is so sad! And I had no idea about your sister! I'm so sorry Deana...what a great mom you are!
Posted by: Jennifer Yates | March 12, 2011 at 04:05 PM